


Full Moon Lullaby

by JayceInSpace



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-09-07
Updated: 2016-09-07
Packaged: 2018-08-13 19:11:39
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,914
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7982992
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JayceInSpace/pseuds/JayceInSpace
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sirius trying to manage a baby Harry during the full moon.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Full Moon Lullaby

**Author's Note:**

> a Prompt fill

They had worried about this. He had assured Remus that everything would be alright, tried to quell the consent self-blame. Still, he could not push down the fire of rising anxiety in the pit of his stomach and he hears the coo of Harry upstairs. He tells himself to put up a silencing charm so not to wake him. That solidifies in his mind that finality of it all; that for the first time since they were sixteen Remus would deal with the transformation alone.

They had fought mercilessly to get Harry away from the Dursleys. Sirius by yelling and screaming at the top of his lungs at Dumbledore, poking and persuading that no matter what kind of magic Petunia had, he was safer with them were he was loved. Remus in a quiet reserved way, not by saying anything but by backing Sirius in whatever decision he had made. He didn’t feel like he had any say in what happened to Harry despite wanting him desperately. Sirius was his godfather after all, not him. Sirius resented this in Remus, but knew no matter of convincing would sway the way he thought about it. He’d just have to let Remus come into his own as a parent.

All this aside, that did not mean they did not argue about it. Remus, being the practical one, bringing up what they would do with Harry at the full moon. Sirius knew Remus would never forgive himself if anything happened to Harry because of him. 

He was something to be seen, naked. All length and scars and unearthly grace. Remus placed his clothes on the table outside the cage and stepped inside, feet not making a noise at the glided across the room, the stealth of a hunter, a predator. Sirius grabs the rusty bars and looked into Remus’ eyes, seeing them dilate and turn a hellish yellow. Sirius smiles slightly and grabs Remus’ hand, squeezing it. Remus squeezes back limply and retracts his hand, closing the bars around him. 

As Sirius is walking up the stairs he begins to hear Remus groan and his bones bend. By the time he reaches the threshold of the stairs and he had devolved into full blown screams of agony. Sirius quickly shuts the door and casts a silencing charm. He places his forehead against the door and feels the vibrations the noises make, imagining them ripping themselves from the confines of Remus’ throat.

 

Sirius does not sleep that night. He sits outside the door and stands guard as Padfoot. Luckily for him Harry sleeps through the night for once. Sirius could hear his soft rise and fall of breath from the other room. The soft snarls that Padfoots sensitive ears could hear through the charm had stopped hours ago, replaced by groans and screams of pain. They eventually taper off into silent whimpers and finally soft, labored breathing. Sirius shifts back into himself and looks out the front window. The beginnings of the sun is peaking over the horizon, orange and red bleeding into the black of the receding night sky. Sirius pulls out his wand for safe measure and unlocks the basement door. Down in the dusty confines of the basement lays Remus, broken and bloody. His back was to Sirius, curled up and naked. Three long, fresh scars run their ways from the small of his back to the his shoulder blades. They looked red and angry and Sirius knew it would make carrying Remus to bed hard. He picks up his crippled body and cradles it in his arms. Despite this being the norm for so many years of their life, he is still astounded at how light Remus is. He makes a soft groaning noise as he freshly mended bones are shifted under taut flesh, but does not wake. In all honesty, Sirius could re-break Remus’ arm and it would wake him. 

Sirius takes Remus upstairs and lays him in on the queen bed the two of them share. The sheets are threadbare and torn, and smell of mothballs and dust. The only thing in the house that was new or descent in any sense of the word are the things in Harry’s room; some new, some borrowed from various friends. All of them gave Sirius and Remus strange looks when they asked together, but none voiced their disapproval of the situation, two men raising a baby together. These people were their friends, but wizarding prejudice runs deep, especially now in the windfall of a war on progress. 

Sirius shifts into Padfoot and lays himself on the bed next to Remus, his chin resting on Remus’ stomach. He hopes the body heat will ease some of the soreness from Remus’ transformation, but doesn’t want to inflict the entirety of his weight on top of him. The stay there like that for about an hour, Sirius sitting guard as Remus’ breathing becomes less shallow, less labored with pain. He had just fallen into a deep, unfitful sleep when the shrill cries of Harry resound through the flat and Sirius’ head shoots up. Unsurprisingly, Remus is not roused by this and continues to sleep soundly. Sirius shifts back and lumbers his way to Harry’s room, stiff and exhausted. 

Harry is about two years old at this point. He’s not a crier so much as a babbler. On most mornings, Sirius could wake to Harry talking absently with someone only he could see, likely being up for hours content to listen to himself talk. Sirius would just stand in the doorway for a few minutes, watching him. Amazed that this little person has changed his life so much, at how happy a baby he was despite the circumstances. He mind would shift to Peter, and wonder where he was and what exactly he would do if the rat made his way into his home. At that point, he would shake off the dark clouds that threatened to overtake his thoughts and pick Harry up and dress him for the day. On this particular morning, this was not the case. Harry screamed and cried for reasons indiscernible. Even when he was fed and changed and being rocked gently in Sirius’ arms, he still proceeded to cry unrelentingly. 

“Shhh, I know,” Sirius said, “I’m worried about him too.”

And so in a desperate plea for some quiet, he takes Harry to the bedroom where Remus lay fast asleep. Almost immediately upon seeing Remus, Harry quieted down and pointed at the figure on the bed.

“Moo,” he cooed. This was what he called Remus, not being able to even attempt his name and being too young to say “moony”.

“Yeah, that’s Moo, Harry. Moo has had a very tough night and needs to sleep. So we have to be very quiet,” Sirius tries to reason with him.

“Moo,” he says again, reaching for Sirius’ aristocratic nose and grasping in gently.

Sirius giggles and lays Harry down on the bed. He immediately goes to crawl for Remus, but before Sirius could do anything to stop him, Harry plops down beside Remus, not touching him besides a small hand on Remus’ chest. It’s as if Harry understands that Remus is delicate, but needs to have him there. Harry almost immediately closes his eyes and drifts back off, cradled at Remus’ side. Sirius can’t help but smile and wish that he still had Remus’ old muggle camera. 

He moves to the other side of the bed and checks Remus’ temperature. He’s slightly feverish, but that is to be expected. Not sure what else to do, he gets in the bed besides Harry and begins to drift off, knowing the Remus is safe with Harry standing watch.

 

He doesn’t sleep well but deep. He dreams of full moons and open wounds and Remus tearing himself limb from limb. As he wakes and knows that neither he nor Remus will be up to doing anything for the coming days. He considers Harry for a moment, small and delicate but immensely strong. He thinks of all the things he’ll need to in the coming days to keep not only Harry but Remus from succumbing to the elements of life. He tries to get some more sleep in light of this, closing his eyes tightly, but it’s no use. He slides his eyes open and notices for the first time that Remus is looking at him.

“Hi,” he says dumbly. Remus looks exhausted and decidedly broken. 

“Hi,” he replies, his voice cracking. 

“Can you move?”

“Kind of don’t want to,” he says, looking down at Harry, snoozing soundly in the crook of his arm.

Sirius smiles and looks back up at Remus, who is still looking at Harry as if he’s never seen anything so amazing in his life.

“How are you feeling?” Sirius tries again.

Remus looks up and gives a look of contemplation before answering, “I’ve had worse.”

Sirius knows this is true, but still thinks it’s unfair that he should ever have to have this bad again. It had been years since Remus came out of a full moon with more than a few scratches. Now he had gashes that if they were any deeper would expose his spine, and Sirius hates it. Remus sees the concern in Sirius’ face.

“I’m looking into the research on the wolfsbane potion. It’s still in development, but if I could get into a trial---”

“If you get into a trial, you’d have to register yourself with the ministry. You’ve spent too long avoiding it, and you know if they find out you’re living with us they’ll take Harry. It’s too risky.”

Remus’ face crinkles a little and he stares up at the ceiling. Sirius notices his mistakes as soon as he said it, but knew Remus would say nothing about it.

“All I mean is,” Sirius says, lightly touching Remus’ shoulder, “that we have a good thing going. All we have to do is figure out what to do with Harry during the full moons. I was thinking we could get ourselves a baby sitter---”

“And let a stranger know exactly how to get to Harry?”

“No, I was thinking that Molly Weasley. She already has a few kids under her belt, and a kid Harry’s age. Maybe she’d be willing to take him once a month. She’s always loved babies. And we can trust her, both her and her brothers were order members.”

Remus considers this for a moment, but says nothing. He looks back down at Harry, who has since woken up and sat quietly between the two of them. Sirius had never imagined this. He never thought he would get to have kids, being who he was. It amazed him every day that not only does he have Harry, but he has Remus to share the experience with. Overcome by a swell of emotion, he leans over and plants a kiss on Harry’s head and one on Remus’ lips. 

“What was that for,” Remus asks, smiling.

“I love you,” Sirius replies, steadfast and steady in his conviction of that statement. He has never loved any two people with the same intensity, and he’s overwhelmed by it all of a sudden.

Remus opens his mouth to reply, but Harry gets in first.

“Eat?” he says, pointing at the door.

Remus chuckles, and Sirius plucks Harry up off the bed and heads to the door.

“Sleep,” he commands gently, and Remus obeys, a smile on his lips.


End file.
